Christmas and a matchmaker's 10 ideas about self-love
What can you give yourself as a last little token of love, before you close the chapter that is 2019? When I look back on 2019, I realize that it has been a long year. Many lessons learned. Many new angles, ideas, philosophies, contexts, life destinies, research studies, questions, answers, interactions, books and…hugs.
I feel an urge to write down everything I captured, and share it with you. But then I realize that maybe that's not really what I actually need, but what I need is to allow my brain to slowly but surely start slowing down before the darkest, calmest and most balancing time of the year.
Self-love shines in neon at every breakfast seminar, workshop and retreat right now and yet it feels as if it shines with its absence in everyday life. Do you feel like I do, that when you take a warm bath with candles lit and without a mobile phone, then you have really hit the big drum and given yourself a lot of love? I'm a good swimmer so I can lie there for a good 45 minutes, but more than that I challenge you to lie there and shrivel up. I therefore feel "good" when I have given myself 45 minutes of silence and warmth.
But then I look at the calendar and realize that it's not entirely impossible to have a couple of weeks off over Christmas and decide that 2 weeks of self-love should be the best way for me to leave 2019. Two weeks without a lot of junk light , short quick showers, short quick hugs, short quick lunches, quiet music in the hope of "landing a little", missed calls and calls that go to voicemail...so you know. You also know.
So. What is the hardest thing about self-love, for me? Is it taking the time? Is it to cut back on sugar or TV? Is it sweating more?
Everything above makes a point, but what I have the hardest time with is that fine balance between giving and (receiving).
Giving is easy for me. I give my time, my ears, my heart, my smile and presence. But to receive without feeling that I want to repay a thousandfold, therein lies the challenge.
Give myself time – quite easy.
Allow yourself to give me time, love and presence without at once giving back – well.
So Christmas 2019 will be about self-love in the form of standing with open arms and receiving love from everyone who loves me. Because there are many.
Besides that, I thought I'd add some extra energy on:
Seeing the Christmas calendar every morning, there is something about morning time with lights and elves.
Write down which friends and acquaintances I simply didn't get to see as much as I wanted this year, and tell them how much I like them and that next year, "damn it".
Hug my close about 20 seconds longer than I usually do.
Be outside and breathe crisp air every day. With no other goal than just to breathe.
Play some more. Play games maybe. Make snowmen if the weather permits.
Fast a little between all the food and goodies, I feel so damn good from fasting from 6-12 every now and then.
Go for a treatment, such as a facial or a massage, or both.
If I am met with "Christmas stress" from loved ones around me, meet it with love. It's also purely selfish – it's nicer to react with love than to be annoyed.
I know I'll be watching movies (so shoot me), so I'm going to make a list of good movies so I don't end up mindlessly binging.
Slow dating everyone I meet. Take ten minutes between different people I meet and breathe a little, so I can be fully present in my meetings.
How are you thinking of giving yourself some extra love this Christmas?
